Archive for Think Moments

Missing Pages

{ September 6, 2007 @ 4:44 am } · { Family, Music, Think Moments, church, friends, life }
{ } · { Comments (2) }

 Song: Missing Pages Artist: Seventh Day Slumber

On the outside all we see is clay
That hides the perfect life
But no one really knows the pain inside

I understand how much it hurts
To be the one who’s never seen
The missing pages in a magazine

No one knows you anymore
You’re lost inside the walls you’ve built
No one knows you anymore
A prison deep within your soul
There is One who sees it all
He’ll give you life you’ve never dreamed
He can see the pain underneath your skin

It’s hard to see you fading
Nothing that I do can bring you back
I pray to God that you don’t fade away
Your addiction is a symptom of a lost and dying soul
Without Jesus there’s no hope at all

There’s so much more this is not the end
It’s all in your hands don’t throw it away
A beautiful life with so much to give
The image of God underneath your skin

The beauty of God underneath your skin (3x)

~Today it really hit me how many people go around life hiding behind masks, afraid to let people see the “real” person behind. Our masks come in many forms. Joy, peace, spirituality, maturity-whatever we believe defines the perfect person, we become it. Heaven forbid that someone see the grossness inside. Jesus talked about this-he said the pharisee’s were like White washed tombs. Pretty on the outside but full of bones and rotting fleash. I don’t know about you but I’m tired of this. I’m tired of walking into church and seeing 1,000 perfect, happy people when I know there’s got to be more people then just me who are struggling and suffering. Christians are the worst about masking who they really are. We’ve become these perfect people with these perfect lives that non-Christians can’t relate to.  I challenge to you take up arms, and to tear down masks. Starting with yours. Once you become open to showing people how gross you are on the inside you’ll be supprised at how many people admit to you their brokeness also. I know this because this is what I’ve begun to do the last year of High School-starting with my small group and moving to my friends. It’s amazing how many people show me that I’m not alone by atmitting that they struggle in the same ways as me or have delt with similar “thorns in the fleash”s. It’s only by vonerability that you can expose yourself to another person and often times it’s the way we are healed.

Surprise!

{ August 25, 2007 @ 12:24 am } · { God Moments, Think Moments, friends, life }
{ } · { Leave a Comment }

Sometimes life is just full of surprises.

I saw my dear adopted (not really, just as a sister in Christ) sister at the Library. It made my day to just be able to hug her and catch up.

I went to the hospital and interviewed the Child Life Representative. She was VERY friendly and SO helpful. I left feeling encouraged and very informed. I’m still processing!

Someone hit our car today while we were parked. I don’t see HOW they could have ever done that…but they did. At first I was pretty upset. I mean, I know my Dad (hello Dad) would be mad. But then I got to thinking about the reasons why they might have bumped into the car. See, I believe everything happens for a reason and a purpose. On the way home we saw an accident that had just happened. We could have been a part of that if we hadn’t had to stay and call my Dad. Although it was a surprise I’d rather not have happen again…..there was a reason.

I’m looking forward to spending today with a friend. We’re going to go to the best grocery store ever, watch the movie Elf and just be together and have fun!

Hmmm….thanks God!

{ August 2, 2007 @ 10:04 am } · { Think Moments }
{ } · { Comments (2) }

Tonight I went driving with my Dad. 495, 66, Fairfax County Parkway, Braddock Road, we did it all, leaving me breathless and hairless from pulling out my hair at crazy night-time drivers who cut me off. :) I was constantly looking in my mirrors like my Dad told me anda t one time I got to thinking (wow, huh!) I can’t look too long at my rearview mirrors, or my side mirrors or else I miss what’s in front of me. But without my rearview mirrors and side mirrors I don’t know where I’ve gone or who’s following me. It’s a mix. Isn’t that a lot like life? You can’t live life in the past, or else the future passes you by. You can’t live life in the future or else you forget where you’ve been and what you’ve learned.

Another thing. I was swimming laps at my beloved pool and I’m on number 10 or so (it’s starting to hurt) and I see someone has their legs in MY laplane. I start to grumble, probibly another annoying kid. How COULD they just sit there, blocking me from doing my flip turn properly. So, I swim up to the wall and do my flip turn rather awkwardly and hope they realize that I am there and they need to move. I keep swimming and then I start back and realize-THEY’RE STILL THERE! How could they? As I get closer I notice something. Not only are their feet in the water, but their hands are too, and they’re waving. Maybe I should lift up my head and see who it is? It was my amazing friend Sherri! I was so excited to see her and proceded to apologuise for the evil I was thinking against her. But isn’t that a lot like life alos? So many times we get annoyed at people for interrupting OUR lives and OUR space when really God has placed them at that moment to be in our lives to make it more enjoyable. We wern’t ment to swim, or live alone.

It makes me giggle like a little gorilla when I think of all that God is teaching me through these daily moments. Isn’t He simply the best?

How can I be Silent?

{ August 1, 2007 @ 9:28 am } · { Think Moments }
{ } · { Comments (1) }

I LOOOVVEEE Barlow Girl. I am probibly the biggest fan in Northern Virginia. I love the lyrics. I love the sound. I love Becca, Alyssa and Lauren. They are my heros and my inspiration. I love the honesty that I see in the lyrics. I love how they’ve stood for purity and stood up when everyone tells them they should water down the message they bring to appeal to a larger audience. I love how real they are-they admit they struggle and they are vonerable. I admire that. Saying all this I just got the new Barlow Girl CD today. It actually came out last week but I couldn’t get to the mall to pick it up until today. As I popped it into my CD player the melody and lyrics shifted me into my own little world for an amazing 10 tracks. The first track broke me as I realized how true it was in not only my life but most of my brothers and sisters.

Artist: Barlow Girl Album: How can we be Silent? Song: Song for the Broken

“I am the confortable secure, the definition of this western world, and I have perfected deceit, even I believe I’m above saving. I’ll never let you see, I am the broken, I am the bruised, I am the poor ones, I am the used. It takes me falling to the ground to admit fully needing you. Then when I am breathing my last breath, come and save me, I will cry to you. Cause pride has not let me say I am the broken, I am the bruised, I am the poor ones I have been used. Why does it take so much to bring me to my knees, Why does it take so much pain for me to see, if strength is only found when I am on my knees why is it so hard to show I am week? I am the broken, I am the bruised, I am the poor ones, I have been used.”

Why does it take so much to bring me to my knees? Why does it take so much pain for me to see? Why is it so hard to show I’m weak?

It’s so hard for me to admit weakness. It’s so hard for me to let others see inside. I have perfected the art of faking. I am really good at drama and unfortunetly I can put on a pretty good mask. My friend Candi did an excillant blog on this earlier (www.hislightbearer.blogspot.com). I am really good at lying when people ask how I am. Most of the time I just don’t really think about it, some of the time I don’t think they’d really care, but occationally I just outright lie because I don’t want to take the time to explain things. The Lord has been revealing to me just how horrible this is and how in reality it is LYING. When I think about it, I hate it when my friends are fake with me, most of the time I can tell they are and it really bothers me, but what about when I’m fake with them? How does that make them feel? I’m trying to get better at this and day by day I’m finding freedom in it. We really wern’t ment to live alone and the more I share, the more I see that many others of my brothers and sisters are stuggling in the same ways as I am. So I may not be good, I may not be great, but He has given me life, and He has given me breath and I am BLESSED!

Sharing Chalk Together

{ July 27, 2007 @ 2:02 am } · { Think Moments }
{ } · { Comments (3) }

On Tuesday me and my older sister went to go take my two little sisters to the park. We got about a block when one of them stopped. We continued on, but she didn’t budge (she has a habit of if she doesn’t want to do something, or gets hurt she’ll run away or just quit) I desided to just take her back to the house. I wasn’t really in the mood to chase anyone around the park anyway, so some chalk and bubbles were calling my name.

As I reached her I realized she was crying (she used to never cry, but lately she’s been crying more-a good thing) I had to carry her the whole way back home (it wouldn’t be that bad but she’s getting heavier and my Anterior Patellum femoral pain syndrom has been bothering me!) . I got there, out of breath and got out the chalk. She desided to go work on riding the little bike we have.

Heart

I drew a heart lopsided heart and began to color it in, with different colors (click on the link above and you can see the finished project) After awhile she desided to come over and she began to color on MY picture. I being immature was battling inside with “I don’t want her to mess up my picture!-it’s not that good to begin with, it’s uneven etc.” It made me think. So often in life I have this same additude. I have my heart and different people come into my life with chalk in hand, and I don’t want them to see my already scribbly heart, I don’t want them to mess it up even more. I’m afraid they’ll leave it half finished just like everyone else. I’m afraid they’ll leave. I’m afraid they’ll use a color that doesn’t fit MY pattern. But you know what, after awhile it actually started to look pretty good. And then I started to have fun! It was cool to color with my sister. I felt the bonding (everyone say awww!), I felt closer with her as we both, chalk in hand attempted to redeem my poor attempt at a heart. Isn’t that a lot like life and Godly friendships? So often I’m paralized that someone will leave me 1/2 colored, skribbled, or lopsided when I really shouldn’t worry because the best artise has me covered in colors not known to man.